In the vein of Tolstoy's masterpiece "War and Peace" but not as literary worthy, we bring you the seventh part in our seemingly endless one sided anthology. The question at hand it would seem is whether or not the Queen of TV, Ms Oprah Winfrey herself, could tolerate co-habitating with her "wanna be" muse, Bad Bunny. With headache powders and good gin at the ready, we launch into what one can only hope, will be one of the last installments is this series.
Dear Miss Winfrey,
It is with great excitement that I send this wee package to you, as your trip to Australia looms closer. What a meeting of the minds it will be. For like you, I am often misunderstood as the previous letter sent to you by Au Pair Shannon and Au Pair Jennine shows.
I mean, really, I know we need to keep our friendship and mutual admiration within the “fold” so to speak, but, it would seem that The Nursery Staff at Nanny Pickle have completely misunderstood just what great friends we are.
This brings me to the high tea party, that, I am throwing in honour of our blossoming friendship. I have been madly signing some Bad Bunny merchandise that you can take home with you when you leave Australia. It is always great to have souvenirs of the places that you have travelled to and the people you have met. I don’t want you to be sad about the fact that we don’t live next door to each other. Wow! Wouldn’t that be great! If we were neighbours, you wouldn’t need the life size cut out picture of me that I have had to prepare for you. You could just see me every day.
I know that “familiarity breeds contempt” because Nanny Pickle is always telling me to make myself scarce. I figure that is so she can understand how much she misses me when she sees me again. Being an adult sure is complicated.
Will you miss me when you leave Australia Oprah? I know I will miss you but being a Bunny makes me cuter and more easy to cuddle. Perhaps it would be better if I just went home with you? It might make things easier for you. I would hate you to have to go and see Doctor Phil because of me. I have heard that saying “absence makes the heart grow fonder” but I don’t think it really would apply in this case because I fear you may just get very sad when we are apart.
Do you think Stedman would mind if I moved in?
My only problem then would be what to do with all of the sad people here at The Nursery of Nanny Pickle.
I will have to think long and hard about all of this. Gosh, being a celebrity sure has its moments. I am sure you are learning all about this
I am off to check how my Meadow Friends are going with the construction of the firework display that I am working on for our tea party. I have had them fashion a huge effigy of me, Bad Bunny, for your viewing pleasure.