Behind The Nursery Door

BEHIND THE NURSERY DOOR : The adventures of two rather tired Au Pairs and one rather errant but lovable Bad Bunny

Thursday, April 22, 2010

10 things you wanted to know about Nanny Pickle but were too afraid to ask.

The Au Pairs are delighted to bring you a list of the ten things you may have always wanted to know about Nanny Pickle but were afraid to ask (she can, after all, put up quite a dauntingly strict façade).

We bring you this scintillating list on the condition that you promise on your weathered bible to never disclose to another sole the contents herewith.
  1. Nanny does actually vacation in Ibiza, and on occasion takes the company of one of the many young and English challenged locals of the manly persuasion.
  2. Nanny likes to take a tipple of gin or medicinal whisky most nights after Bad Bunny has been put to bed. On the rare occasion, she awakens from her comfortable armchair, glass in hand, in the wee hours of the morning.
  3. Nanny has a real fondness for Au Pair Jennine(the ratbag element of the Au Pair pair), although she would never disclose this.
  4. Nanny finds Au Pair Shannon just a little fastidious and stuffy. She takes great pleasure in disclosing this at any given opportunity, however secretly congratulates herself on creating a suitable replica of her own glorious person.
  5. In her early days, Nanny took flying lessons with the dream of becoming the first female fighter pilot. Upon learning women could not be accepted into the flight squadron, she wrote a letter to the then Prime Minister pointing out the exploits of her heroine, Amelia Earhart, and labeling him a jingoist and dullard.
  6. Nanny’s music of choice is the oft-misunderstood Nana Mouskouri.
  7. Nanny, although not prone to vanity, does indeed shave her legs, though only to below the knees. You see, although it could be deemed the practice of conceit, there is nothing more unattractive on a lady of maturity than a dark pelt of leg down.
  8. Through the acquaintance of Au Pair Shannon, Nanny found herself in the position of meeting the venerable Sir Sean Connery. Much to Nanny’s chagrin, Sir Sean tried without result to endear himself in a most humiliating manner to Nanny and although she tried to explain her celebrity attractions ended with Sir Michael Parkinson, he insisted on pursuing her with gifts and poetry. Not that Nanny wished to be seen as a social snob, but he had after all married (and divorced!) an Antipodean woman, and he himself was from Glasgow.
  9. For a brief period in the sixties, Nanny experimented with skirts that ended above the knee. Although modest by the current times standards, the fashion whim ended when Twiggy became so incredibly commonplace, and therefore just a touch peasant.
  10. Although one should be entitled to love whomever one wishes, Nanny could never quite forgive Prince Charles for his dalliance and subsequent nuptials with Camilla Parker Bowles. Firstly, she never understood a double barreled surname, and secondly, frankly, Nanny believed she looks like she belongs in Charles’ stables, not his stately home. 
If you have any other questions regarding Nanny Pickle please leave them in the required fields below...not that we approve of idle gossip mind you.

3 comments:

  1. Yes Fiona, it is often the best policy...but this is always at a lady's discretion, of course.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh my, what a hoot! Just the medicine I needed :)

    ReplyDelete