What a sojourn this has been indeed, o' fair and gentle reader. Like Aunt Dot and her unlikely posse in Rose Macaulay's "The Towers of Trebizond" we have set off into the blue yonder with camel and headache powders at hand. And in all honesty, haven't the highs been moderate and the falls monumental? In fact this story has seen more falls than the Italian soccer team in a World Cup decider, for the want of a better analogy. How the Au Pairs have tried to excuse, blame, apologise for and ignore Bad Bunny's antics and how Bad Bunny has risen to the challenge of growing an ego the size of Norman Foster's "Gherkin" in London is the mettle legends are made of.
So sit back and enjoy the final installment in this 9 part series....all three of you who have been following it.
Dear Oprah,
I feel that I can call you Oprah these days, after all, we have been corresponding for some time now.
On that note, I don’t seem to have received your RSVP for the high tea party. Perhaps your assistant has forgotten to pop it in the post? Nanny Pickle often tells the Au Pairs, especially Au Pair Jennine, that good staff are so very hard to find.
Just because we are famous, Oprah, doesn’t mean we don’t suffer the slings and sparrows of everyday Bunnies or people. If ever you need a hand with staffing your office let me know. Some of my Meadow Friends might be able to help you out. Of course, we would have to have adjoining offices with views and one of those electric pencil sharpeners.
Imagine us working side by side…
Also, I notice that you have not “liked” me on Facebook nor are you following me on Twitter. Don’t be shy! People will find out eventually that we are BBFF’s (Best Bunny Friends Forever). Perhaps this way we just let people know softly so that they don’t get jealous. I mean, I can’t be friends with everyone now can I?
Looking over everything now I realise that I have not received many answers at all to many of my questions. I am thinking that this is because either Au Pair Shannon has been posting my letters to The Ellen Show instead of The Oprah Show, which may well be the case, or, you have had an operation that has left you with a massive bandage going all the way around your head….you know like in Days of Our Lives when they have a car accident and then they reveal their new face and they look really different.
I hope you get better soon Oprah. Let me know if you need anything.
I will get my people to talk to your people as to what may have happened to your correspondence to me. Giraffe and Chicken will get to the bottom of it all. They are very good at detective work.
I will wait by the post box for your reply…. hopefully it will stop raining. It’s not nice being water logged when you are a Bunny.
Kind Regards,
Bad Bunny
(To date, The Nursery of Nanny Pickle is yet to recieve any corresponance from Ms Winfrey or her legal staff which is a relief to Nanny Pickle and the Au Pairs. Bad Bunny, it would seem, has turned his attentions to one Ms Ellen Degeneres...who apparently still has a show so therefore must be a bigger and better celebrity than Oprah anyway.)
