Bad Bunny now considers himself quite the sage in matters of all things retail, and in selling ones wares to the discerning public. The Au Pairs, however, beg to differ, but unfortunately are unavailable for comment at this time. They can be found locked in their respective rooms with a damp flannel across their worried brows. Bad Bunny is not quite sure why they are refusing to speak to him.
- It is unacceptable behaviour to “borrow” babies in prams in an attempt to lure their mothers into the Nanny Pickle store.
- It is unacceptable behaviour to wheel clamp said prams whilst mothers are in the store, in an attempt to keep them from leaving.
- “Upselling” does not actually mean sneaking more items in the bag with other purchases nor does it mean harassing people deemed to be tall in order to sell them your wares.
- Whilst working in shopping centres, one must not joy ride on trolleys. It is not only dangerous, particularly on down ramps in car parks, but it appears to upset trolley boys.
- One must never, under any circumstances, repeat the Au Pairs private conversations to fellow shopkeepers, particularly when those conversations are about the fellow shopkeepers diabolical choice in attire, and their penchant for tattoos that they will inevitably regret later in life.
- Although it may have seemed like a good idea at the time, stealing trolley boys ocky straps in an attempt to turn them into bungee ropes so as one can bungee through the centre atrium only leads to very angry trolley boys.
- Endeavouring to expand the public’s cultural mind by hijacking the central Personal Announcement System and becoming “DJ for a Day” is not tolerable conduct and is contrary to Centre Management’s Code.
- Locking the Au Pairs in the storeroom overnight is deemed a punishable act. Punishable too is repeating the words uttered by said Au Pairs once they were discovered by Centre Security.
- Asking large ladies when they are due requires discretion and forethought. Not all large ladies are indeed “with child”.
- Trolley boys do cry….especially when you hide the keys to their little trolley tractors.
Kind Regards,
The Nursery Staff.